Fully Grown Homos Podcast
Welcome to the Fully Grown Homos Podcast.
Our aim is to create a safe space where everyone can find connection and inspiration.
LGBTQ+ Queer
Fully Grown Homos Podcast
Fifty Blokes And A Prolapse Walk Into A Bar
We set out to compare gay and straight sex and ended up building a practical, funny field guide to first times, technique, consent, and why culture matters more than labels. Miami returns with big laughs, useful tips, and unfiltered stories that make the awkward feel normal and the normal feel exciting.
• guest Miami returns, relaxed and ready to share
• first times unpacked, pain vs pleasure, pressure vs pacing
• toy hygiene, consent mid‑scene, why clean matters
• rimming, douching, edging, and prostate talk
• anatomy basics for clitoris, glans, and prostate
• squirting vs creaming, what’s typical, what’s porn
• positions that help: side‑lying, riding, doggy, missionary
• group sex culture, safety norms, and navigation
• technique over size, listening over guessing
• humour that lowers shame and raises curiosity
Don’t forget to like, comment, and subscribe, and share our podcast with your curious friends. You can contact us on Fully Grown Homos Podcast at gmail.com or any of our socials, Fully Grown Homos Podcast
If you want to send us a question or would like our thoughts on a particular topic you can contact us at Fullygrownhomospodcast@gmail.com or contact us on any of our socials at Fully Grown Homos Podcast.
Welcome to Fully Grown Hymos, a podcast about our adventures as fully grown hymos navigating today's world full of inquisitive friends' questions about gay life and the unexplored activities of a life lived as fully grown homos.
SPEAKER_03:We'll discuss the gay 101s, sex, sexuality, and topics we don't even know yet. As we want your input into what you want to hear, nothing is off limit, so email us on the fully grown homoespodcast at gmail.com.
SPEAKER_02:Or message any of our socials, Fully Grown Homos Podcast. Hey Dave. Hey Matt. It's Saturday night. It is, it isn't Saturday. It's Saturday night. And we have a special guest.
SPEAKER_03:Not just a special guest.
SPEAKER_02:Oh the guest. The guest that is guesting us. Well, let's give an intro to see. Here we go.
SPEAKER_00:I don't give a fuck because I'm in Miami. Bitch. Yeah, I'm in Miami. Bitch. Because I'm in Miami. Bitch. Oh honey, I'm in Miami. Bitch.
SPEAKER_03:Welcome, Miami. Hello, welcome again.
SPEAKER_05:Hi guys.
SPEAKER_03:Hi. You couldn't resist us, could you?
SPEAKER_05:No, I had to come back.
SPEAKER_03:That's back for more. Yeah.
SPEAKER_02:And less nervous this time.
SPEAKER_05:A little bit, yeah, definitely.
SPEAKER_02:Yeah, yeah. It's only taken not even a full bottle of wine.
SPEAKER_05:No, not.
SPEAKER_02:Well, I'm more of a turbulent. Well, you're on tooth.
SPEAKER_05:Two of everything.
SPEAKER_02:Two of everything. We'll talk about that later. Yeah, those will definitely be happening, yeah. Those conversations will definitely be happening. That's just sorry, that was really annoying my legs because it was rubbing on my legs. It wasn't me. ADHD. I'm a sensory king. Um, so yeah, I um I I know it was the earphone, the headphone jack cord was rubbing on my leg. I'm sure it was. And it was either gonna make me really irritated or really horny. Um we know what happens both ways, don't we? I get angry, people. You made the same noise both ways.
SPEAKER_05:I thought you used to things rubbing on your on your leg all.
SPEAKER_02:Yeah, but not my own cock, trust me, I wish. Yeah, somebody else rubbing my cock, that's for sure. But yeah. Um Welcome back, Miami. Yeah, so what brought you back?
SPEAKER_05:I had so much fun last time. I had to come back, guys.
SPEAKER_02:And we had fun with you as well. Yeah, and you we got lots of really good feedback about how good you sounded, and people were surprised.
SPEAKER_05:I was surprised, actually.
SPEAKER_02:Yeah, you you were actually surprised yourself, weren't you?
SPEAKER_03:How did you find listening to yourself? Was it weird?
SPEAKER_05:I thought I was gonna hate it, but I didn't. Okay. Like I didn't. I'm uh to be honest, Dave, I'm a bit upset that Matt still has not listened to my episode.
SPEAKER_02:Look, I'll get it. He doesn't listen to any of them. To be fair, I don't listen to any of them.
SPEAKER_05:Yeah, but that's not any.
SPEAKER_02:Yeah, I know. But I I'll I'll I'll have to try.
SPEAKER_03:I'll promise to try. When I've when I'm in the car with him, I purposely put it on. He does. He does. He does. Yeah.
SPEAKER_02:So yeah, I've I have listened to a couple of them. Yeah. Um did Euros. Um yeah, no, but I d I look, I just know that if I listen, I'll want to then go and edit stuff, right? And I don't like editing because I don't I this is unfiltered. This is totally unscripted.
SPEAKER_03:That sounds fine.
SPEAKER_02:Unscripted, unfiltered. I know, but the thing is that if I hear stuff that I don't think I should have said, right, which I'm super critical of myself, right? And if I hear things that I don't think I should have said, well then I want to go back and edit things, and I won't edit things, but then what I'll do is I'll start being cautious about what I say, and I don't want to be cautious here. I want to just say what's on my mind. Um, and look, I filter, trust me, I filter. So tell us what's on your mind. Oh, not my heart, it's fucking empty. Um, it's empty. Like you build at them over there. No, yeah, no, they're they could do it and empty. Um, I'll get you to do that later. Not Miami, sorry. You wish.
SPEAKER_05:Um I'll pass on that one. I'll let I'll I'll leave that to you, boys.
SPEAKER_02:And who knows? Who knows? When we weren't planning on going to church tomorrow, but Dave might get out there and he might get the sun and the shine and he might go, oh fuck, I'm horny. No. No, I don't know. No, no, tomorrow's not a church.
SPEAKER_03:I think I think it's just gonna be a day for celebrating for celebrate.
SPEAKER_02:It's a long weekend at the end of the day, isn't it? Go fuck yourself. I don't get a long weekend, I just get two days. So yeah, but it's still happy. I'm a corporate. You with your fucking 75,000 point IQ and all that kind of shit. Thank you. So, what's been happening? What's what's what's Miami been up to? I almost went and rogue and called you your name. I really did.
SPEAKER_05:You did it yourself last time, so I have not been up to much. Work, work, and I've been really tired this week.
SPEAKER_02:Yeah. Yeah. I think we've all been tired. We were discussing that earlier. We said we've really had a tired week.
SPEAKER_05:I feel like there's something going on. I don't know if there's some sort of lunar explosion. I think it's the moon going.
SPEAKER_02:I think the moon is definitely a issue. Apparently, tonight, tomorrow, one of those days.
SPEAKER_05:What's an equinox? Isn't that a country?
SPEAKER_02:It's it's like it's like a unicorn, but with a bigger no, it's like a unicorn with a bigger horn.
SPEAKER_05:Oh, I'm thinking of Ecuador. Equator. Yeah, that's yeah.
SPEAKER_03:They're the guys with the big dicks. It's when you have the longest day and the longest, shortest day of the year, the equinox. You know, I mean, this is all too with the sun cycles and the the earth rotating and stuff. Every day is a school day. Okay. They're looking at me perplexed, so I'll let you I'll let you Google it and check out.
SPEAKER_01:I can't believe you held both our attentions in.
SPEAKER_03:I know this is this is strange because they both looked at me to say, what the fuck are you talking about? Yeah, yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_02:Look, we're both very good looking. Um it wasn't a sexual one, was it? Yeah, yeah, but yeah. Um, the like today's topics. Oh, fuck, I just sounded really slow then. Um, today's topics we're gonna actually discuss, right? We asked we wanted to get um Miami and Britney on. Um Britney's a chicken. Um no, Brittany, Britney's probably busy. Um, because we did ask I think she's a little bit hesitant. But she's hesitant because she is very reserved and very shy. And so I don't think she wanted to say anything that she wouldn't be comfortable saying just in case somebody listens. And because you know we've got millions and millions of listeners.
SPEAKER_05:I wish someone told me that before last podcast episode I did. I listened back and was like, wow. You know what? Did I say that?
SPEAKER_02:Yeah, yeah, you did. Yeah, you did. Peggy said that like it's nothing you can't say now.
SPEAKER_05:You know what I am upset with you guys about though?
SPEAKER_02:What?
SPEAKER_05:I've got a bone again.
SPEAKER_03:Oh I like a bone. We got the other played that thing, give me the bone.
SPEAKER_05:So my bone this time is how come you didn't keep my spit what what what is it?
SPEAKER_02:Spit swallow goggle?
SPEAKER_05:Yeah, and I came up with spit, swallow, gargle, and smear.
SPEAKER_03:I don't know. Oh, we didn't use smear, did we?
SPEAKER_05:No, we didn't keep the smear going. I was I was very disappointed. Oh.
SPEAKER_03:Does it matter where you smear it or is it anywhere? Anywhere. Anywhere. Anywhere. On your titties, on your anywhere.
SPEAKER_05:Um, injecting like salmon sperm now.
SPEAKER_02:I know that's crazy. Really? That's crazy. I don't even eat seafood.
SPEAKER_05:Salmon sperm. I'm not like I know, right? If I get a smell in your face, if I get a hotmail salmon to come on my face, well that's one thing, but I'm not injecting hotmail salmon or hot male small and I like it, I like this.
SPEAKER_02:She's quick. See, this is why we're friends, yeah. I know. Um, yeah. Um, so um yeah, I hang on, I'm just um you you talk, I'm just writing shit.
SPEAKER_03:Um yeah, so we had a bit of a chat earlier, didn't we? Uh tonight. Um had a bit of a laugh as well, didn't we, about different things. And uh we decided that the best sort of conversation that we would have tonight for the podcast would be discussing sexual encounters, both from a heterosexual point of view and obviously a gay sexual point of view. Um obviously, for me, I'm the middle man here, so Matt being the only gay, you being the only heterosexual. Yeah, but I've had sex with girls. Yeah, but what I'm saying, identifying.
SPEAKER_05:I mean, I I've I've had full sex. I've had sex, I wouldn't say.
SPEAKER_03:Yeah, I've had sex with men and women, you've had sex with men only.
SPEAKER_05:Yeah, but have you have you? Stuck it in. Yeah, but have you eaten the splash?
SPEAKER_02:Oh no, no, I haven't I haven't gone down.
SPEAKER_03:Yeah, no, exactly.
SPEAKER_05:So we've done that. No, I'm sorry.
SPEAKER_03:So yeah, so we th we thought we'd just do a little bit of a segment um to discuss the differences and some similarities and maybe some misconceptions, I suppose, between our minds asking each other questions about what we experience and what we take on sex, I suppose. And and what's more enjoyable? Day sex every time. Well, sex every time, yeah.
SPEAKER_04:Doesn't matter what day sex every time.
SPEAKER_03:But then that's sex and your perspective. I mean, Miami would get the same sort of sensation but in a different way. And this is what we're gonna ask, you know. So I'm gonna start.
SPEAKER_05:I'm gonna start Dave's gonna have to be the sounding board, I feel, because he's we talked about sounding last week.
SPEAKER_03:Oh, yeah, I wouldn't want to do sounding.
SPEAKER_02:Do you know what sounding is? No, okay. So sounding, Ms. Eddie told us last week that she'd done sounding. Um we knew what sounding was, but we'd never so sounding is basically when you get a metal rod, right? And these rods can be small, they can be small or they can be the size of a eyes open, and yes, that's exactly where they go. Right down the eye of your cock, the eye of your shaft. Yeah, and it's a pleasure thing. So I supposedly. Do you think it would like I couldn't think of worse? I I can't, because I've had a catheter, like I've had catheter pull out when I had um surgery. So like my what do you call kidney stones done and all that kind of stuff, and I had them blasted and I had to have a drain in, and they put a catheter in so I could pee. Um, because I had to go under and they pulled the catheter out, and it was like literally ripping the back of my throat out.
SPEAKER_03:It is very painful, right?
SPEAKER_02:Very, very painful. So painful. So I thought, why would I ever put something in there? So, yeah, no, very, very painful.
SPEAKER_03:But also, you're looking if you look at the size of these rods and the thickness of the eight-inch. I mean, if you've got like a say a four-inch cock, I suppose, you know, I mean, just just just picking up a random number, and you've got like an eight-inch like metal rod, I mean, how far are you pushing it internally? Because it's like I couldn't think of any.
SPEAKER_05:And what sort of damage could it do?
SPEAKER_02:No, no, no. This is where it is, I guess it's um, and again, there's people that I guess that are playing this field, well, they're it's quite safe from that perspective. Okay, um, because it's like got a little round tip on the end, right? So it is actually goes in smoother, and you would use lots of lube, I would imagine. Um, and again, that's one for Ms. Haiti when she comes on.
SPEAKER_05:But she did say I feel like it just screams UTI to me.
SPEAKER_03:No, no, because of the cleanliness, it's all sterile. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's not passed on between each other. It's only one use only, you know. I mean, that's in like it gets used to a sterilized.
SPEAKER_05:No, have you ever had someone pull out something and use it on you, and you thought, shit, I wonder if that's been cleaned in between. I've had that happen to me.
SPEAKER_02:No, I was cleaning. Well, sorry, it is like me or something. I suppose we're going back to our game.
SPEAKER_04:I had a flashback.
SPEAKER_02:So we had we had an earlier for our lists, we had an earlier warm-up game of would uh never would I ever. Um, so this is this is kind of flashing us back to there. Um, so what somebody used a sex toy that looked like it'd already been used?
SPEAKER_05:No, well I didn't know. I didn't even know.
SPEAKER_02:Um I couldn't I can't see you properly, sorry.
SPEAKER_05:You're just you're distracting me. I know he's wrecking the blade. Put his switch back on.
SPEAKER_03:He's been a Freddie Murphy look, he's holding the mega. All right, now I can see you, better.
SPEAKER_05:So what I was saying, better.
SPEAKER_04:Yeah, right.
SPEAKER_05:Alright. Um what I was saying was I was having a fun time with an individual that I casually saw who was only one, anyway. Yeah.
SPEAKER_02:Back at the time.
SPEAKER_05:He was one of the four.
SPEAKER_02:One of the four. Oh, do you remember the four?
SPEAKER_05:We won't go there. We were just like, it's an injoke. It's an injoke. Um, and he uh was quite a rough man, we'll put it that way.
SPEAKER_03:Oh, is it looking or looking or both?
SPEAKER_02:I could get up and throw you around.
SPEAKER_05:Yes.
SPEAKER_02:Yes, please.
SPEAKER_05:Rhoda Harley, that sort of thing.
SPEAKER_02:Oh, yeah, okay.
SPEAKER_05:And we were like doing it, and then all of a sudden, out of his drawer, he just pulled out a dildo and did you ask him if he had a dildo in the drawer?
unknown:No.
SPEAKER_05:I was too shocked before I even knew it was the and I was like, my OCD was going, um, where did this come from? Who's used it? Has it been cleaned?
SPEAKER_02:Like what are you doing with it?
SPEAKER_05:What's happening here?
SPEAKER_02:How do I rinse myself internally? Yeah. Yeah. Oh wow.
SPEAKER_05:Sorry, that just got sidetracked there. But did he made me think about it?
SPEAKER_02:Did he use it? On you in it?
SPEAKER_05:Yeah. Oh, okay. It w it was in there before I even knew it was in there. It was a thing.
SPEAKER_02:It was up to the back of a throne. Not really, because it was just too rough with it, yeah.
SPEAKER_05:Well, no, it's he was trying to do the whole double penetration thing. So there was one in there and one in there.
SPEAKER_03:Okay. Okay. Can we ask which one it was? Which one was where?
SPEAKER_05:The dildo was in the front.
SPEAKER_02:Okay.
SPEAKER_03:Yeah. Okay. No, because it could have been the other way.
SPEAKER_02:It depends. Like it depends on size. So yeah. Um, you'd never complain. No. On size, I do.
SPEAKER_03:He's been down front and back as well.
SPEAKER_02:Yeah, hang on. I've had one in my mouth and one in my ass, that's for sure. And then one in each hand. Um, and then one under on my eyes. I was waiting for you to pick up on that. I was waiting for you to pick up on that. Hang on a second, I don't have a front. Hang on.
SPEAKER_05:I know, I was like, is there something coming missing here?
SPEAKER_02:No, I definitely don't. I have a a pickle.
SPEAKER_05:So we're gonna get back on we're gonna get so off track again. Here we go. So I don't even know where our track was.
SPEAKER_03:Yeah, back to where we were.
SPEAKER_05:Yeah, Dave. So yeah, so basically you need to be the like ring, the circus mar is what's the circus guy? The ring leader. The ringmaster.
SPEAKER_03:Yeah, the ringmaster. Yeah, so basically, um I would say from my perspective, I've had sex with both men and women. Okay, and obviously, you asked me earlier how come you're not bi I did. I was pretty trained by this. And my honest opinion or my honest answer is oh, I'm definitely gay, and I've always known I was gay since I was like in my late early teens, I suppose. But again, like I said, society pushed me down the route of like going down the straight narrow path, I suppose. But again, I mean, you know, for me, some women I know are pretty wide. Yeah, um, but did it did it sort of phase me? No, not really. I mean, I I did enjoy the sex, I did enjoy sex with men.
SPEAKER_05:Um but and that's what that's where that question came from, I think for me.
SPEAKER_03:But I never had anything to compare it to either at that point.
SPEAKER_02:Yeah, see, whereas for me, so but it just doesn't it just it sits uneasy with like sex with women for me. It kind of and and I I don't this I don't want this to be offensive.
SPEAKER_05:I'm looking in your face, I know it's gonna be offensive, so just it's kind of repulsive.
SPEAKER_02:Like it just I just feel that it would be messy and yuck. Messy, yeah, like vaginas, like I've seen them in the movies.
SPEAKER_05:Shit comes out of your asshole.
SPEAKER_02:Yeah, but it's also very stays in there, but it stays in there. It does it though. It does, but it does it though.
unknown:Okay.
SPEAKER_02:He does look after himself, for me it does. For you it does, but in general, in general, like it it will hold tight, right? Around the and stay in there for the most part, right? Um, but like I just feel like I've seen too many prolapses, I think. Um where prolapsed vaginas. Where the whole thing falls out.
SPEAKER_05:What the fuck have you what are you watching?
SPEAKER_02:I don't know.
SPEAKER_05:I just I haven't even seen a prolapse vagina. What are you doing? Like, what are you doing?
SPEAKER_03:You've not seen a prolapse anus. Oh, they're gross. They call it rosebuds. They call it rosebuds. He's saying they do he's called a rosebud. Oh my god.
SPEAKER_05:He's saying that he's seen a prolapse vagina. And he's seen too many of them. That's why you can't like it.
SPEAKER_02:I think because a lot of women that I used to like, and I'm okay, obviously they were older ones.
SPEAKER_03:I've I've lost it. He's taking it to her grave of this older generation that I used to hang around.
SPEAKER_05:What just open their legs? Who in your life? Who in your life is just opening their legs? No, no, no.
SPEAKER_02:Okay, maybe maybe scene is not the right word so much as being conversations.
SPEAKER_05:Did someone say that? Matt, help me pick this up.
SPEAKER_02:Jerry, can you grab my handbag? I need you to help me pick this up. Um no, I think it's I'm intrigued as well. Come on. It was more around the conversations where people would say that like like I remember. Oh my god, I'm so sorry, neighbours. I remember my neighbour's mother had a prolapse, right?
SPEAKER_05:Like yeah, but can I?
SPEAKER_02:How would you know? No, but well, I was young at the time. Do you know what prolapse was then? I think that's where I've probably seen the images, like Googled or something like that. Yeah, but actually.
SPEAKER_05:It was a lot more it was a lot more common back in the day.
SPEAKER_02:Yeah.
SPEAKER_05:Because people have women were having you think back to the day, like women were having like eight children and things like that. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_04:God.
SPEAKER_05:So I'm just letting you know that not every female is walking around with the children. I think it's reverting.
SPEAKER_03:I think he's reverting back to his past tense in life where we did that. I'm just segment. I'm just where he was where he was he had eight kids, and that's probably where it comes from.
SPEAKER_05:Well, Dave, I don't think I'm ever gonna get out of my head the statement Matt said about I can't look at vaginas, they're disgusting because I've seen too many prolapse vaginas in my life.
SPEAKER_02:I'm gonna show you my Twitter. Alright. Um, they're gross anyway, so straight sex is gross. The end. I can pretty much press stop now.
SPEAKER_03:Um, like for me, I've like I said, I've I've had both men and women. Yes, and I enjoyed both, but obviously for me, I know I'm gay and I know that I prefer sex with men. And like I said to you earlier, I mean I was sort of like living in this sort of like very timid life of very vanilla sex in terms of the heterosexual side of things. I never explored, I never did anything that to me. Dave Sun, stop listening now. But hey, what Dave Sun, stop listening now. Um yeah, I think he said stop visiting, sorry.
SPEAKER_05:No, um Wow, where is this episode going tonight? Seriously.
SPEAKER_03:Well, what I'm saying is when I entered the gay gay side, I was sort of like blown away, literally blown away. I was uh blown away by the amount of promiscuality, the amount of sexuality promiscuity? Promiscuity, promiscuality, promiscuity, promiscuality. What's wrong with that?
SPEAKER_01:You say urinal, I say urinal.
SPEAKER_03:I'm just you said vaginal. No, promiscuity is the word anyway. Okay, we digress. Anyway, yeah, so for me, um, I was just sort of like blown away with the amount of slumps. No, but the amount of variation of sex that men do. Oh yeah. In terms of like their there's so much variety of what the gay world does compared to the heterosexual world.
SPEAKER_02:But hang on, that's compared to your heterosexual world. Exactly.
SPEAKER_05:Yeah, what I'm saying is exactly this this girl's a freak.
SPEAKER_03:That's what I'm gonna ask.
SPEAKER_05:So when you're comparing though to the heterosexual world that you were in versus the gay world now that you're in that is quite out there and clothes and why do you look at me like that?
SPEAKER_01:Because you're the you're a whole, yeah.
SPEAKER_02:Okay, true.
SPEAKER_05:I think that you have to wear that one. If you were in a heterosexual world that was similar to the gay world you're in now, would you still feel the same way?
SPEAKER_03:Um maybe not. Because you like Dick so much so much.
SPEAKER_05:Oh, I'm not down.
SPEAKER_03:Look, I like I've said to you before, I I could still have sex with a woman.
SPEAKER_05:And that's where my question around.
SPEAKER_03:But I wouldn't choose to have sex. If something happened, or I was I say I was like invited into a three-way with another guy and a woman, then I would definitely still probably.
SPEAKER_05:But if you uh were out one night and there was a a woman that you found very attractive and you know she had this confidence about her and she was hitting on you and you like, you know, and she had boobs like the girls in Hunting Wives. Are you telling me you wouldn't go I look?
SPEAKER_03:I don't think I would go to the full extent of having sex. I could probably make out with her, but then again, I I love making out with guys. I do. I think kissing guys is so different to kissing women.
SPEAKER_02:I wouldn't, and I can tell you exactly why. Alright, because I would be so good at it, right? That that chick would chase me and chase me and chase me. Until she had a prolapse.
SPEAKER_05:And she would chase him after she picked up her prolapse from dying off the ground. Flipped it over her shoulders.
SPEAKER_01:She would chase me because I would be so good at it, that's why I would never do it. Alright? So yeah, that's yeah. He is a study.
SPEAKER_05:Do you, Matt? Here's a question for you. The how many females did you did they come?
SPEAKER_02:Oh god, okay. To the tent door. Um so one of them was when I was 11, right? And she was like 13.
SPEAKER_05:Okay, Jesus, yeah.
SPEAKER_02:Alright. No, just Matt. Um, right. Um, so coming wasn't really an option.
SPEAKER_05:It was an expensive.
SPEAKER_02:It also was in my backyard in a tent, alright?
SPEAKER_05:Okay.
SPEAKER_02:In small tent? In my tent, yeah, and camping in my backyard.
SPEAKER_05:And on a serious note though, was that your first prolapse giant roll?
SPEAKER_02:She was a meaty girl. Right? She was a chunky girl. Did you know what you were doing? Right. So I think it was well, did I know what I was doing? No, not really. Right. Not really at all, right? Um, but like it was a game of spin the bottle that turned into a day to put that in there, right? And we were kissing, and then next minute I fucking got my dick in her, right? Um, but then we heard the back door open. So our sisters were coming outside.
SPEAKER_04:Stop. Yeah.
SPEAKER_01:So therefore that ended really quickly, all right.
SPEAKER_02:So there you go, right? So yeah, and then the second one, I was like 18 years old, just over 18.
SPEAKER_05:And she was a netball still.
SPEAKER_02:She was a fucking stunner, right? Stunner, right? Um, but again, that was in the again, in the back of a car. So it probably wasn't like, but that would have been again, it would have been a tidy vagina, because she was fit everywhere, right? Wasn't at one probably wasn't prolapsed. Um, nipples out of it. No, no, she was so fit. Um, but I think I don't know.
SPEAKER_03:It just So how far did you get?
SPEAKER_02:I was in. Yeah, but what I'm saying is I don't know, because I did it, I did it unwillingly as well. Now I don't want to say I don't want to say unwillingly, because I wasn't raped, right? Um you could ever be raped, Matt.
SPEAKER_01:You could ever be raped.
SPEAKER_02:She when we were at the club, for example, she wore, and I still remember it, right? This white little romper tiny thing, tiny type of thing, right?
SPEAKER_05:And she kept like dropping the shoulder of like dropping the the prolapse in time for a second.
SPEAKER_02:No, kept dropping the sleeve off her shoulder all night and go, oh, stop it, you're trying to undress me, right? And I kind of went, no, I'm not, right? And like, because I was so naive, right? Uh from women's perspective, right? I was still at that stage going and fucking blowing guys in public toilets and doing all kinds of stuff.
SPEAKER_03:What made you go then? Um, you didn't have to spin the ball this time, did you?
SPEAKER_02:No, because she was my girlfriend, right? I mean a girlfriend. Girlfriend, girlfriend. No proper girlfriend. We were together. Well me. I was very closeted. I know. This is probably my mind actually. I was very closeted.
SPEAKER_05:This is you probably should have led with that part. Yeah, okay. Like, because he, me and Dave are just like, uh, thinking she's a random girl.
SPEAKER_02:No, no, no. No, no, no, no. She was my girlfriend.
SPEAKER_05:At the club with your girlfriend.
SPEAKER_02:With my girlfriend, right?
SPEAKER_05:Who was trying to hint to you, I want to have sex tonight.
SPEAKER_02:That we're gonna have sex tonight, pretty much. Yeah. So at what point in the relationship was this? Fairly early on, I want to say. Right, okay. Right? It's not like we'd been dating for years because it was. She would have been weird if you had and you had no sex. Yeah.
SPEAKER_05:And did she was she aware that you were blowing every Tom Dick and Harry at the blow at the Glory Holmes or no?
SPEAKER_02:I don't think she would have been. Um, nobody knew. No, I didn't tell her about her dad or her uncle.
SPEAKER_05:She couldn't taste it when you when you kissed her, or I recognize that was a woman before.
SPEAKER_02:Oh my god, you guys are filthy. Um, but um, yeah, and then sort of I guess so. Did you have foreplay with her? Yeah, we could kiss and make out and all that kind of stuff. Did you eat the clam? Did she wanted to? I don't believe so. I don't I don't know. I was really oblivious to the ways of women. Are you nervous telling us?
SPEAKER_05:Can I just ask you what you did then?
SPEAKER_02:We kissed, we probably caressed each other, like and I said it sounds like a 10-year-old, isn't it?
SPEAKER_01:Um no, um like I've just touched each other up.
SPEAKER_05:I've never seen you. So awkward. Are you talking about anything in your life?
SPEAKER_03:If you just see about the space, he's like blushing, he doesn't know what to do. He's so funny.
SPEAKER_05:Alright, tell me tell me what you did to it. Come on.
SPEAKER_03:We're interested. The whole world wasn't over.
SPEAKER_05:Come on, big boy, tell me.
SPEAKER_01:What was her name again?
SPEAKER_02:No, I would never. Um, but yeah, so I think we just touched like felt each other up a bit and stuff like that.
SPEAKER_04:Yeah.
SPEAKER_02:Um did she blow you? No, I don't think so. What the fuck?
unknown:What did you do?
SPEAKER_02:Don't even I like I look, it's it was this was 18 years old.
SPEAKER_05:Well now I know why you think heterosexual sex sucks because no offense, what you're describing to me right now is fucking horrible. And it is not a clear representation of heterosexual sex.
SPEAKER_02:I think it's exactly what it's like. Can I ask how long the relationship lasted after this encounter? Oh, not long, no, no, I don't know. I think I think it was pretty much I think it was pretty much done then, right? Because I said, look, you know, this isn't for me, right? Now I still didn't I can tell.
SPEAKER_04:Um excuse me.
SPEAKER_02:Um he sweated like that. I I I'm actually sweating. It's freaking hysterical. I think the lights are way too hot in here in the studio. Yeah. Um, but no, I just think that I wanted to get out of there before I did any damage because I knew I was gay.
SPEAKER_03:But I also was questioning damage, sorry.
unknown:Don't stop.
SPEAKER_02:I'm intrigued as to what maybe her prolapse, I don't know. Um, but yeah.
SPEAKER_05:He didn't want to cause a prolapse.
SPEAKER_02:So she didn't turn you gay, obviously. No, no, no, no, no. I was very much gay. Okay. Very much gay. Um, but yeah. Um Were you horrified by it all? I was I wasn't wrapped in the situation.
SPEAKER_03:But were you were you sort of like embarrassed by the whole thing? Probably? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Probably. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Why? Because I didn't know what I was doing.
SPEAKER_05:I don't, but I don't think anyone knows what they're doing at the start of that. No, but I did know what I was doing with guys. Yeah, well, but that's it. So that's why that felt right. So how I don't like the clam, but I'm a throat goat.
SPEAKER_03:So how so obviously with your first time, okay. You you're horrendous. Did you did you actually find it like really painful? Did it put you off?
SPEAKER_05:Yeah, yeah, yeah. So painful. I was like, what is this?
SPEAKER_02:And that wasn't me, by the way, team.
SPEAKER_05:He was horrible too.
SPEAKER_03:Oh my god, my throat tonight. I know, right? Um, yeah, sorry. Um, so when you had obviously sex first, was it what you thought it was gonna be? No, were you put off by it?
SPEAKER_05:Yes.
SPEAKER_03:Okay, very much. So what was but then clearly she found it. No, but obviously, because did did you did you question yourself thinking, is it me? Am I the only person that is not enjoying this?
SPEAKER_05:Or he was a lot older than me.
SPEAKER_03:Okay, which is a good thing. In some degree.
SPEAKER_05:So well, I was like just turning 16. Okay. He would have been twenty one.
SPEAKER_03:Okay.
unknown:Okay.
SPEAKER_05:Um, maybe yeah, around there, I would say.
SPEAKER_01:And was he a regular boyfriend? Relative then.
SPEAKER_05:No, he was just one on the fucking many rotations. So this is this is where you learn to be Miami. This he was no, no, I was I was a really good girl back then, actually.
SPEAKER_02:Yeah.
SPEAKER_05:And he was a boy, you know, the boy you always had the crush on.
SPEAKER_02:Yep, yep.
SPEAKER_05:It was the the friend's, you know, one of my best friends' brothers friends. Yep, yep, yep, yeah. You know, you you watch those American sort of rom-com college boys college, and you know that the girls are there and it's their friend, you know, the friend's whole brother, like all of that. It was that sort of scenario. Okay. And I liked him for a long time. Well, I thought I did, I was like 15. Like I love you. Yeah, we're gonna get married. Exactly. Um, and it just sort of progressed from there to you just going back to the the whole concept of the sexual side of things, did you feel overwhelmed?
SPEAKER_03:Did you feel like you didn't know what you were doing? Did you let him guide you?
SPEAKER_05:No, what yet at that I had no idea what I was doing. Can you remember what you did?
SPEAKER_03:Yeah, did you blow him off?
SPEAKER_05:Did you no, I laid there.
SPEAKER_03:Okay. So you said so.
SPEAKER_02:My experience sounds really good compared to that. Hang on, I just laid there. At least I felt fucking boobies. I was so young. Yeah, you were 18. I was only 18.
SPEAKER_05:It was only a couple of years now, do you want me to get to my 18-year-old stories? Because I tell you they trump yours.
SPEAKER_02:So she learned a lot after the first session. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So she went from zero to hero.
SPEAKER_05:Um, but it was just so painful. I remember it was like I was nervous, I didn't know what was gonna happen.
SPEAKER_03:Did you did you see him again afterwards?
SPEAKER_05:One more time. Well, it's a funny story, actually.
SPEAKER_01:Okay.
SPEAKER_05:Here we go.
SPEAKER_01:At a family reunion.
SPEAKER_05:Well, I had to, because he lived up the street from my best friend. And like I said, he was my best friend's brother's friend. Yep. However, he I did see him one more time. I was like a stupid naive girl and he rang me up and said, Come see me, and it was purely just for sex. Yep. Um, and then a couple of years later, we actually got together as a couple and we were together for a couple of years. Oh wow, okay. Yeah, so when I was 18, um was the sex still better at that point?
SPEAKER_03:Because you obviously knew you were more knowledgeable, you knew what you were doing.
SPEAKER_05:No, I'd only had one partner.
SPEAKER_03:Right, okay.
SPEAKER_05:Between him and that experience.
SPEAKER_03:Okay, so you hadn't had enough options.
SPEAKER_05:No, I'd had one other partner.
SPEAKER_03:Okay.
SPEAKER_05:Um because I it put me off, right? It was so painful, it put me off for the same.
SPEAKER_03:That's the same, it's the same with guys when they have anal for the first time. It's like, no, I'm not doing that again. I'm not doing it again. But you have to sort of like convince yourself it was just a bad experience, or I've got I've got to try again.
SPEAKER_02:My first anal experience wasn't a bad one.
SPEAKER_05:Oh, right, because the thing is that again, from I was at a sauna, or at bodyline, oh your first anal experience was in a sauna.
SPEAKER_02:Yeah, but but wait, I was laying face down, right? Because Jesus Christ. Right. Take me in a space. Nothing's changed. That's how I met him. No, I'm joking.
SPEAKER_05:He's for his asshole's face.
SPEAKER_02:We we met when some other guy was sucking my dick and I looked over and I went, Oh, that's a better option. Um, decided to go that your next. No, no, no. He basically came in and cut in. Um yeah. Took him away. Took him away and put his my mouth in my cock in his mouth, and I went, Oh, actually, you're pretty good at that. Um, but yeah, yeah, but my first experience, right, anal experience, was I was fairly young, right? Um 22, 23-ish. Because I didn't jump straight into taking a dick, right? Um and because I was gonna be that kind of gay. I was gonna be no, it was more of I thought it was gonna be a top, uh, even though I didn't know what a top was.
SPEAKER_03:Well, I was the same.
SPEAKER_02:I honestly didn't think I was gonna have sex anal sex. But I was laying face down in this sauna and somebody came up and started rimming me, right? And they were rimming real good, right? Like, and I'd never had my ass licked before either, right? Um, which is what rooming is, obviously. Um shut up, I was talking to people like they didn't know what rimming was, but I'm looking around this room and we both all know. Um, so yeah, and he rimmed real good, but then he just started sliding it in.
SPEAKER_03:Sounds like a song, didn't it?
SPEAKER_02:And it actually um it felt really good. So I just sort of went with it. And like I hadn't back back.
SPEAKER_05:Was it big? You hadn't douched. No, I hadn't douched right with that.
SPEAKER_02:I didn't know about douching. I didn't know about douching, but it wasn't messy or anything like that either. Yeah, yeah, pretty sure. I would have remembered that. I would have remembered it was horrible because he would have stuck his cock in his mouth afterwards. So he wouldn't. No.
SPEAKER_05:But didn't you how do you get past the feeling of you're gonna shoot yourself?
SPEAKER_03:Well, you douche. But then I know what you're saying, because I still have that sometimes now.
SPEAKER_05:Yeah, like I do when I've I stop, I stop.
SPEAKER_03:Yeah, because my back hurts.
SPEAKER_05:But it's a feeling like I'm gonna poo and I'm gonna.
SPEAKER_03:Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And I think when you get to that stage, you think I mean I know that I know that I'm clean, I know that I've I've expelled everything. So I know nothing's gonna happen, but uh like you said, you get that sensation where you feel the pressure, you feel like, oh fuck. Well, if I if he fucking pounds me anymore, I'm gonna fucking shit myself, you know. I mean, even though you know in your mind you're not gonna happen like that.
SPEAKER_02:Yeah, but the thing is that the last few times I've felt a bit not right.
SPEAKER_03:Yeah, but you haven't done anything. So I haven't done anything intentionally. You know your body better than anybody, yeah, you know, and you're the same as me.
SPEAKER_05:This is another example of why heterosexual sex is just easier. See, this is this is too much for me. I don't want to have to worry about all of the I just want to light it.
SPEAKER_03:But would you obviously you've obviously had anal sex, obviously. Yeah, I have. And how do you find it compared to vaginal sex?
SPEAKER_05:No, I don't like it. No, uh, is there's obviously a big difference because we haven't got vagina, so that that's the wrong that's the wrong word. I it's not that I don't like it. Like I'm you know It's not your preference, but I get off on vaginal sex, so I'm almost going to preference.
SPEAKER_03:Well it's it's the right it's the right hole anyway.
SPEAKER_05:Yeah, so yeah, so I'm that's where that's where my preference is going to be.
SPEAKER_03:But you haven't you haven't got your G spot in your uranus anyway, so it's not gonna be the same pleasure as what we have. So anal sex for men and anal sex for women are gonna be slightly different in that regard because there's obviously something more it's like with you with you, you've got your clitoris and stuff in the front, so that's gonna be stimulators, which is important.
SPEAKER_02:I don't know her that might have fallen out with the big thing.
SPEAKER_03:I I get I get what you're saying.
SPEAKER_05:Oh what I don't have a prolapse vagina, not yet. Um mine's still like not it's a bit chunky, a bit meaty, but it's still there.
SPEAKER_02:I know you're wearing tights, I know.
SPEAKER_05:Um, I didn't even look actually. I've never looked. I've never had any complaints.
SPEAKER_03:I would not look.
SPEAKER_05:Let me tell you, I've never had any complaints. Yeah, so going back to this whole scenario where you I did know a girl once whose vagina reminded me of like a fucking cauliflower. I thought first one. Oh wow. Yeah. Was not nice. No, I didn't imagine. It's like imagine like opening your lace and it's like a cauliflower pocket.
SPEAKER_01:The only way I eat cauliflower is with cheese sauce. So yeah, that would not be good.
SPEAKER_02:Yeah.
SPEAKER_05:I only saw it in photos, like me and another girlfriend were going through her phone.
SPEAKER_02:I've seen that other one that okay, and that one's an ugly one. You know, that one was a bony thing that was like almost stable.
SPEAKER_05:Her friend. Oh her friend is cauliflower mort.
SPEAKER_02:Okay, but hers, hers, and we're not mentioning names, even though she'll never hear it.
SPEAKER_05:Um she might.
SPEAKER_02:She might, but we're not mentioning names, but her really bony, because I'm talking about cauliflower mort. And it was constantly open. Like in the video that she showed, it just gapped. Yeah, it was gapped, wide open. And she used to complain that the guy she was sleeping had a small dick. I'm thinking, don't think the problem's him, love. Um, right. Anyway. Sorry.
SPEAKER_05:It's just the ADHD gick and I love it.
SPEAKER_02:I tell you, welcome to my world guys, because this is the best thing ever.
SPEAKER_03:I love it. Okay. Do you actually look at it with a mirror? Some women do that. Yeah, I've had to. Okay. Yeah, well, obviously, yeah, but I mean, but would you look at it just from an aesthetic look? I because some people get off on that. I know, but you know, back in the day, I, you know, it used to send the gash people going back to the day after your first session with this guy, all right. This is where I wanted to get back to where we were. So did you confide in your friends for advice, or did you talk about it and ask them? Not really. No. How did you feel? Did you feel dirty? Did you feel like degraded? Did you feel no?
SPEAKER_05:I thought I felt like the fuck? Why do we do that for? That hurts, I felt.
SPEAKER_03:Okay.
SPEAKER_05:But I was a like, yeah, an experience, absolutely, yeah, yeah, yeah. But yeah, now it's different.
SPEAKER_03:So if you if you could if you could take yourself now back to that stage, what would you do different?
SPEAKER_05:Oh, it wouldn't warm up. Wouldn't be him, number one. Okay. Would not be him. Number two, yeah, warm up. I'll be like, what the f are you doing?
SPEAKER_03:Like so what did you what did you do in your own? Nothing. No, but what mean what did you do? You did nothing. No, but what did you do between your first time to the point where you started enjoying it and getting to the point where you went exponentially?
SPEAKER_05:I had a partner who was the same age as me.
SPEAKER_03:But knew what they were doing?
SPEAKER_05:Knew what they were doing and uh was more passionate and so did you did you engage more in more like you got your squirrel changing.
SPEAKER_03:But did you you know but did you do oral sex and stuff at this point?
SPEAKER_05:No.
SPEAKER_03:Okay.
SPEAKER_05:Not not the first time.
SPEAKER_03:No, I mean after the first time.
SPEAKER_05:Yes.
SPEAKER_03:Okay, and what what sort of like coerced you into that? Was it him asking you to do it or no?
SPEAKER_05:I just You just did it.
SPEAKER_03:And did you feel like you knew what you were doing?
SPEAKER_05:Yes, because I watched a lot of porn. I'm sorry.
SPEAKER_03:Okay, this is where I was gonna ask this is where I was gonna ask what did you do to emphasize your ability to learn?
SPEAKER_05:What do you still do as women? Or maybe it's just because I'm slightly neurospicy.
SPEAKER_03:Yeah.
SPEAKER_05:We um we uh l mimic and learn things from people.
SPEAKER_03:So what could you obviously asked Matt and I a question earlier tonight about the number the number of people we've had in one time? Yes, and we honestly said that probably 50 would be probably the the number of people that we would have in one session, and it has happened. I mean, yeah, that's crazy.
SPEAKER_05:But it's it's down to but it's about the time what through me as well is the time in which you guys' session would last.
SPEAKER_03:So yeah, but you're talking, I mean, when we're explaining about 50 guys, it's not like one after one after one after one. We're talking about 50 people in a room, I suppose. That's all engaging, yeah.
SPEAKER_05:But it's it's just like not in a bad way.
SPEAKER_03:No, no, it's it's it's like this is where See I've here we go again.
SPEAKER_05:You know, when you watch a lot of porn, as some of us do, yeah, occasionally, which is 90% of the uh people yeah, we we filter like all what we watch, and I went through a stage where I was watching like you know, that like what's that country?
SPEAKER_03:Uruguay.
SPEAKER_05:No, no, and it was Ecuador, yeah, but no, that that country. Oh, what is it? It's like one of those, I think, Slovakian countries or something. Oh god, I'm gonna offend someone here. But don't come for me. No one come for me, okay? This is then it's like and they have like the Venus Festival, and it's like a sex, it's like a sex bow on drugs.
SPEAKER_03:What in Europe?
SPEAKER_05:Yes, the Netherlands, somewhere over there, okay.
SPEAKER_03:Berlin and stuff like that.
SPEAKER_05:Berlin. That's the country. Where's Berlin?
SPEAKER_03:Germany.
SPEAKER_05:Germany, so that's not Europe. Is that the Slovaki side? Like the kebabs?
SPEAKER_03:Lucky. That's more Mediterranean, though. You're talking centralized Germany. German.
SPEAKER_05:Berlin. So I got I went through like a bit of a stage, right? Don't you fucking look at me because I know you're always fetished stages you go through with your porn. Um and I was watching a lot of like the Berlin, like I guess they were spas.
SPEAKER_03:Yeah, okay, yeah.
SPEAKER_05:And like group sex things. Okay.
SPEAKER_03:Like, but like not what men or women and men or mixed. Okay, yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_05:And not like put on, not so not a performance like a real life, like just and like the Venus festivals and stuff.
SPEAKER_03:Just full on full on people having wild sex, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Absolutely. And that happens a lot, yeah. So with us, it's very similar, but obviously it's just only men only. Yeah. Um, but it's just it's just weird because it doesn't you don't just walk in and it's there, it just evolves. Does that make sense? So you could be like Matt and I have this this this way that when we go to sex on premises to church, if it's take me in a church wedding, but if it's that intra, right? But when we go there, sometimes it can be quite quiet, or it can be the point where people just walk around doing nothing, and it's just war and it's batshit. So Matt and I will get the things going, and we tend to get things going quite quickly. The party starters. Absolutely. And this is this is how we met Clay, all right? Clay? Yeah, Jeffrey Dahmer. You better Jeffrey Darmer, Jeffrey Dahmer.
SPEAKER_05:Yeah, Jeffrey Dahmer.
SPEAKER_03:Sorry, Clay. Anyway, um I don't mean to offend.
SPEAKER_05:No, you don't. No, no, no, no, no. Just your analogy, yeah. Your analogy, yeah. I have a funny name.
SPEAKER_02:Okay, and and the reason the reason Miami calls him Jeffrey Darmer is because I think the week no, no, the week after we met, um, I said he was gonna come over here and stay with us, and we didn't really know him.
SPEAKER_05:No, you didn't know him.
SPEAKER_02:No, he's had his cock inside me, so I kind of know him well enough.
SPEAKER_05:Matt, you wouldn't even know half the people that have had their cock inside you, let's face it. So don't you cannot use that as a like, oh, he knew me well enough because he's had his cock inside me. You probably didn't even remember his name at that stage, let's face it.
SPEAKER_01:Broke Dave.
SPEAKER_05:Dave, I don't know, he tried to take a sip of a drink and it's coming out of his nose. It was too much. Anyway, so we'll let Dave do a bit of a reset. Reset. Um but let me tell this story. So from my side, it makes more sense why I call him Jeffrey Darmer. So I said to Matt, what are you doing? What are you guys doing this weekend? You know, oh, we got a friend coming over. I said, Oh, okay, yeah, some guy we met at church. Church last week. I said, Oh, do you know him? He's like, No, we met him last week. And I said, So he's coming over where? Oh, to my house. I'm like, you don't know this guy. Like, you've met this guy, like, have you not watched Jeffrey Darmer? Like, what have you not watched that Netflix stuff documentary? Like, have you learned nothing from that? And um, so that night I was I was a bit too much. She was really concerned. I was concerned. So I even asked if I could come and get Blondie and Chanel because I didn't want them. But I didn't want the girls to be collateral damaged. And I'm like, I don't are the girls safe? Can I come and get them? I don't want them. So that's where the Jeffrey Darmer name came from.
SPEAKER_02:And and I'm pretty sure I got a message the next morning checking if I was still alive and all that kind of stuff. I'm still alive, yeah.
SPEAKER_05:And then to make sure.
SPEAKER_02:So yeah, it was fucking funny.
SPEAKER_03:I forgot where we were though. What were we talking about?
SPEAKER_02:Who freaking knows? Um who absolutely knows.
SPEAKER_05:So, Dave, I've got a question for you.
SPEAKER_02:Yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_05:So when and I've asked you, poor Dave, I've asked him to cover himself, but I've asked him a lot of questions tonight.
SPEAKER_03:Yep.
SPEAKER_05:And when here's a question there, sorry guys, they're laughing at me already. No, but so as as a gay man who has gone down on a female, what were you we don't need the sound effects, Matt. What were the thoughts out, say that again? As a gay man who's gone down on a female. What were your thoughts? Look at the time.
SPEAKER_03:Like I said, that's your thoughts. No, no.
SPEAKER_05:Um, no, that's your thoughts, Matt.
SPEAKER_03:Let's just say At the time, because I hadn't experienced any sort of like sexual activity with men. But it didn't disgust you? No, not at all. I mean, I like I said, I I enjoyed the sex we had with the with the women I had. And to me, excuse me. Sorry, I'm just trying to get my my thing out of my throat now, because after Matt made me laugh. Oh, he's trying to get the thing out of his throat. Yeah, I'll make it back in later.
SPEAKER_02:Sorry.
SPEAKER_03:Put it away.
SPEAKER_02:Yeah, oh you'd see if it was there. I know he's alright.
SPEAKER_03:So for me. Wow, dang. I know, right? I've got a thing second my throat. Um that's what he said. Yeah, I know. But for me at the time, I suppose, it I knew no defin no knew no difference. I hadn't explored, hadn't really sort of like taken any sort of like steps towards sucking cock or anything like that, you know what I mean, to compare it with. So for me, I didn't dislike it, no. No, I didn't dislike it at all. I mean, I thought at the time it was just pleasurable. I mean, obviously, I wasn't getting anything from it apart from making her or them feel good. Exactly, that's right, yeah. And I never had any complaints, so I don't know whether I was doing anything wrong. But for me, um, when I transitioned over to the other side and learned um how much I preferred doing oral sex with guys.
SPEAKER_05:I feel like it's probably easier. That's just my opinion.
SPEAKER_03:Oh, look, I've I've had guys that can I've had guys that can be there are guys out there that just cannot suck cock. Yeah, there are guys out there with all teeth, and that's fucking horrible.
SPEAKER_02:Yeah, but then some guys you'll discover that somebody's because you've got a really you've got a very good technique, yeah, but you also have this thing that you do that you've done it to me, you've done it to clay, you do it to a lot of people, and it kind of fucking throws us because you're what is it?
SPEAKER_05:Does he gag halfway through?
SPEAKER_02:No, no, no, no, no, no, no. I love doing that.
SPEAKER_03:It's all about the way it's a suck, it's a pressure I put what I'm sucking. So I make it sort of like quite it's quite too. But also, I use my tongue a lot, so I stimulate their glands a lot.
SPEAKER_05:Where's the glands? The head of the penis? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_02:But he does it to the point where you go, stop, stop, stop, stop, because it's it's not like you're gonna come, but it's painfully pleasurable.
SPEAKER_03:So there's this It's almost like you know, if you rub your clitoris, right? And you rub it, so it's quite on the outside now, by the way.
SPEAKER_05:Yes, I do.
SPEAKER_03:Yeah, but you know, you say same with this. Your clitoris should be the same as it's like. Oh, really?
SPEAKER_05:Yes.
SPEAKER_03:Oh, congratulations. Has it always been there?
SPEAKER_05:Um, not always, she wasn't born with it. I wasn't born with it, like Lady Gaga, but um I'm trying to think when I got it done. It it was a spur-of-the-moment thing. Okay, it was unplanned.
SPEAKER_03:Okay, which is good.
SPEAKER_05:It was like we went into a tattoo parlor with three friends. There was me and two other girls, and one of them was going to get a nose ring.
SPEAKER_01:And you went, oh love that.
SPEAKER_05:Well, we were looking, and uh the girls, these these girls I don't I don't talk too much anymore, like well, I don't really know anymore. One of them I still have on Facebook, and she's lovely, and I love them, and they were good fun. And we were just having a bit of a giggle at the display. They had a display of all the different piecings you can get in the vagina. Oh wow, because there's a lot. Um, and yeah, did it hurt? You're like hell, yeah. Yeah, and I just decided, and so she went in and got a nose pissed, and we looked at that, and he said how much it was, and they said, do it, do it, do it. So I said, alright. And I did.
SPEAKER_03:How did he feel though getting your bits out in front of some stranger? It was a bit awkward, yeah.
SPEAKER_05:Because at first the the Were you turned on, we're digressing to progress. Yeah, yeah. But we at first he said to me, and Matt's gonna laugh here, and everyone I told this story to is like, of course he said that. So I was a young girl, I was probably at my hottest. I was probably at my hottest stage back then, and he I said, like, I like this one, pointing to one of the fucking 50 piercings that were on this Vadrina display that was there. And he said, Oh, well, not every girl can get that. It depends on the shape of your clitoris and the hood of your clitoris and all of that. So I was like, Oh, okay, so it just depends. He said, But if you come in, I'll have a look and I'll let you go with you. Yeah, he did.
SPEAKER_03:Of course, the best chat upload ever.
SPEAKER_05:So I did. I went in and the girls were with me. Yeah, and I lied down. He's like, Yep, yep, you know, you'll be right. And I just said, Alright, do it then. And next thing you know, he's I said, Is it gonna hurt? And he said, No, and it did, it hurt like hell. Like, I kicked him in the face, like the leg just jolted.
SPEAKER_03:Did um did you get aroused by him? No, no, not all.
SPEAKER_05:Ain't no one like there was no one's getting aroused where you put a fucking four-inch needle through with a clamp, like clamp it down first, like the clamp hurt enough.
SPEAKER_02:Right, yeah. I thought I my knee nipple really hurt getting pierced.
SPEAKER_03:Like just after that, it's just do you get any sensation from it at all?
SPEAKER_05:Well, no, because after that he's like, I'm that way you can have sex for six to eight weeks and you didn't fucking tell me that. Exactly, he didn't turn out before.
SPEAKER_03:Wow.
SPEAKER_05:But that was okay.
SPEAKER_03:And did you did you obstake six weeks?
SPEAKER_05:I think so. Really? Maybe just what one week? No, no, it what it yeah, it because back then I was seeing this uh guy. Remember the one I told you about before?
SPEAKER_02:Yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_05:I'm sorry, I'm doing a hand signal here.
SPEAKER_02:The guy she told us about before was very thick, like a Coke can, she said.
SPEAKER_05:And um, he was in the Air Force.
SPEAKER_02:Okay, yeah.
SPEAKER_05:So he was sort of away. Right, okay, so it sued him fine in that regard. Well, we uh things went so after that because he wasn't happy that someone else saw my bits spelled.
SPEAKER_03:The weird poor thing.
SPEAKER_05:But that's interesting.
SPEAKER_03:Now everyone's seen it. But and you've you've never taken it out since, or you have taken out?
SPEAKER_05:I have. Uh I took it out when I had my child.
SPEAKER_03:Okay. And did you put it back in again? Yes. Okay.
SPEAKER_05:I think uh difficult Aaron to put it back in front of you. Okay.
SPEAKER_03:Did you have fun doing that?
SPEAKER_05:Um, no, probably not.
SPEAKER_03:Oh, really? Okay.
SPEAKER_05:Because I was probably yelling and screaming at him. No, not there. No, because you can't, like, I'm you can't see it. You can't see it. You can't see the it doesn't give you any.
SPEAKER_02:I know it's prolapse. It's not just like flat out.
SPEAKER_05:I do not have a prolapse. I have a very nice.
SPEAKER_03:I trust you. It doesn't give you any more pleasurable stuff.
SPEAKER_05:I feel like it does now. Okay. So if if I was to do something without it versus with it, I and maybe it's just because I've had it for so long that I'm just used to the feeling with it.
SPEAKER_03:But what I was explaining to you earlier was basically your clitoris is like the head of our penis. So the sensations that you experience from that, I would imagine, are exactly the same as what we would. So going back to what Matt was saying, if you rub the head of your penis in a certain way, you can make it to the point where it's enjoyable, but it's not, it's like pleasure and pain at the same time. So you would have the same sensation, yeah. So that's what he was referring to when he's saying when I do things to people, so does our all I can get to them to that point where it becomes both pleasurable and pain. And with me being in control down there, sometimes I can keep on doing it without them stuck in it, and then they have to pull my head off them because it's like stop, stop, stop. Yeah, and I I started laughing. They all every laughs because we know because every man, like you and every woman would know the sensation you get from having sex, you know what you like, you know. This is why women are better are giving head to other women because you know exactly what you if that makes sense.
SPEAKER_05:I get you.
SPEAKER_03:Same with like a guy, we're probably I'm not saying there's girls or guys that can't do the same to other sexes either, but what I'm saying is, from my perspective, a guy will know exactly what another guy feels, what they like and what he likes. So by doing what he likes to another guy could be like a big turn on for the other guy. It's like when I first came out and I started doing things with other guys, I didn't know how many sexual sensual places in your body you have until someone did something to me. I was like, like Remy, I've never had that done before, even though I know it happens in the heterosexual world. But as a man, I never had that done until I was in the gay world. Um, but there's a bit of your thigh. Inside of your thigh, in between where your balls are on your legs, where you're joining your your pelvic bone is to your legs.
SPEAKER_05:Yeah, yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_03:That if you lick that, yeah, I kiss that all the time. Yeah, so you get the same as well. But have you had it done to you? Have you had it done to yourself?
SPEAKER_05:No, no, but I do it.
SPEAKER_03:But have you asked have you have you have you asked anybody to do it to you? Um maybe you should try and maybe you should get them to do it because I think you would be having size very like. Are you very sensitive?
SPEAKER_02:Okay, are you particularly sensitive or like you'll end up snapping his leg his neck?
SPEAKER_05:But I'm a big like neck person, so my neck's really sensitive.
SPEAKER_03:So, from your perspective, where on your body do you get most pleasure from? Sounds quite interesting.
SPEAKER_05:Trying to think, I'm like, I don't I don't know. I'd say like what do you like being when they're saying like pleasure, like obviously?
SPEAKER_02:So when so when we're talking pleasure, but when you're talking like that stimulation, like Dave loves, like goes absolutely nuts when you got his nipples going.
SPEAKER_05:Oh yes, they're not a nipple person.
SPEAKER_02:He goes fucking wild, like he can almost come from nipple.
SPEAKER_05:Really?
SPEAKER_02:Yeah, right. My nipples are so sensitive, thanks to God, yeah. But like you just got you've got to get him not too hard, not too soft.
SPEAKER_03:I can't remember being bitten or pulled too hard because it's not.
SPEAKER_02:But they're just it's just that like just that right spot. And if you just get it and you like constantly, he just like goes.
SPEAKER_03:Pass me pass me your hand.
SPEAKER_02:Right. Oh god, there's a live demonstration going on here.
SPEAKER_05:Yeah, so like yes, like soft, yes.
SPEAKER_02:But that's over your nipple, sort of stuff like that as well.
SPEAKER_05:But see, I'm not a big nipple person. Okay, because I've breastfed.
SPEAKER_03:Yeah, you do. You've also breastfed as well, which wouldn't have been well, only for a little bit.
SPEAKER_05:Okay, yeah. My to be honest, my boobs have held up really well.
SPEAKER_02:Yeah, you've got great hips.
SPEAKER_05:But because I'm like got big boobs, the men tend to go there first. Yeah, right, okay.
SPEAKER_02:All right. Well, just leave them alone. I've got other parts, you know.
SPEAKER_05:Yeah, I'm not I'm not gonna go.
SPEAKER_03:So what's going on in your free head? Just get on with it and go down there. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, okay. Do you like grab the head and push it down there?
SPEAKER_05:Yeah.
SPEAKER_03:Okay, good on you. You know she would. So you are a little bit dominant, like we were talking about. Yeah, I'll just sit on their face if I really. Oh wow, cool. Yeah, I'm not she's not backwards. So what's your favourite position? Reverse Kilgat Cowgill? Do you like do you like missionary, or do you are you very like do you spice it a bit?
SPEAKER_05:No, I do like missionary. I do. I think it's a bit more.
SPEAKER_03:So is that because you're looking at their face?
SPEAKER_05:I don't know. Yeah, it depends the mood on the face.
SPEAKER_03:Or is it just because the position, like the their own?
SPEAKER_05:Yeah, I also like like when you turned on the side.
SPEAKER_03:Okay, so yeah, yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_05:So if I'm lying on the side and I don't know, yeah, maybe.
SPEAKER_02:Okay. So you'll for me, I if if I'm taking a dick, I like to ride. Yeah, I like. Because you know that makes me just fucking blow a load message.
SPEAKER_03:So for me, I've got to be like more in the doggy position. It's more so because of my back.
SPEAKER_02:If I'm giving I like doggy because I just like the slam, because I'm I get a bit wild and a bit pushy, and it's just like a start chantal.
SPEAKER_03:But I'm do you find rough. Like, do you find when you're in the missionary position that holding your legs apart? hot or holding your legs up, for instance, can become quite difficult entirely. That's somebody else's job.
SPEAKER_05:Yeah, not really, because you're not really holding them up because the pressure of them on top of you, do you know what I mean? Yeah, yeah. It's sort of just naturally held up.
SPEAKER_03:Okay, yeah. Yeah. So in terms of like dick size, what's the biggest you can do? Well you get all the questions. I know well I'm asking because it's interesting to know what the side of like the heterosexual side is, especially from a female.
SPEAKER_05:Like I've had both ends of the spectrum if I'm gonna be honest with you.
SPEAKER_03:In both ends. Like I've had like micro penises?
SPEAKER_05:I would say close to okay yeah there's one I'm thinking of what were you thinking Matt's look Matt's eyes when I would say we've both had a micro penis that's not micropenis.
SPEAKER_03:That's my that's not micro what? That's a bit you're looking the micro penis we've had about the size of your clitoris.
SPEAKER_05:I swear to God can I ask a question yeah go on so oh no I'm no go ask ask oh come on I've seen like in porn sometimes girls with really large clitorises. Now that happens through hormonal it's just natural no one get paranoid here.
SPEAKER_02:But I mean like really big like almost like doodles yeah doodles that what with I was at home talking about Todd love for a second um but and then I've heard that it's like trans women so some trans women are born no no if if they're female to male no male to female male to female well it's custom so you can have it how you want so if you want a larger clitoris right um you can have that so and generally when you're getting a custom made right um because they're using the head of the penis as a clitoris. Yes that's what I mean right so they will carve parts of it away right but and again don't quote me on this um I feel like Dr Matt. But if like the thing is so if there's a massive dick there you're gonna get a bigger clitoris.
SPEAKER_03:Yeah well that's exactly and yes exactly potentially yeah so so that you've still got pleasure there's only so much they can sort of take away there are women that are born with larger clitorises anyway. Yeah and they're the ones that are probably more likely to be transitioning to being men because they were more likely to have a penis but never developed into a penis. Because you everybody starts off a with a vagina when they're in the womb and then I heard that yeah and then you you then they change as you get through a certain stage can't remember what point it is and then girls become boys. Yeah and that's what happens and sometimes it doesn't always happen with a point is this is why you get this this this problem with girls that feel that they're men and well it could follow the problem no no I mean problem with people identifying because I mean they they know themselves you could you could get yourself in trouble in trouble. I just feel like Matt's glaring at us already but what I'm saying is I mean they know themselves better than anybody I'm not judging or anything like that. But what I'm saying is that it's because of that reason all right so but what Matt and I are saying is we've actually seen guys that are guys but they're their penis is about the size of a size of a guy because I've like no that's that's probably about the small penis but there's but you can't do anything with that as a female not as a female it's not going in far like by the time you get past in between the layer and then it's not going in and so you're better off just like jamming it in between there and having it that way and rubbing on the clitoris.
SPEAKER_02:Yeah whereas this is where it's perfect for beginner men um beginner gays not beginner gays with big bums no but most guys and this is this this is what we're talking about earlier right um was that and this what I was saying women's bums are big and juicy are bigger right yeah of course so therefore that's why they're yuck um no oh my god that's why men's bums are better because they're small and and taut and tight and sexy and they're pretty much just a hole yeah but no no no no because Clay's got a fucking great ass Jeffrey Dummer um but he's really no he's top he's top we're working on it Dave's trying it's my mission my mission my mission before the end of the year are both of you verse is that what it's called yeah yeah yeah yeah give and take he'll be verse before the end of the year but did you start off no you you didn't Dave I know you started off as just a top yeah I started off as a top as well yeah yeah that surprised me yeah but I thought you were just straight up legs up in the air verse by space that wasn't flower in me stick the whole bunch make a mouse wildflowers up that is crazy but yeah but so you so so back to like where we originally were which is like five men 50 men yeah 50 menu we're an hour and five yeah but might need to be a two parter yeah anyway so yeah so talking about like no no no I'm not at all but going back to the whole premises of like um having multiple people I never ever would have experienced that in a heterosexual world because it it doesn't happen does it you don't hear of like 50 women and men getting together in a fucking or in Berlin in Berlin exactly at events but it seems to be a lot more common it seems to be like a lot more common with gay men to have multiple like all partners yeah but I think it's just but that goes with the and and and and again but to be honest I think that's it's it's just a men thing.
SPEAKER_05:Yeah so it's not a gay men thing no no no exactly it is purely a men thing. I think so as well it's not gay verserxual it's just men in general like straight men if they had the option to have multiple people in a room all banging each other they would do it as well as the women that pull back from that I think so why it's so stupid jealousy I guess do you do you feel like in your community it's all men seems like with men as well in there and just with men we're always horny we we think about fucking dick and cock all the time.
SPEAKER_03:Yeah but women are horny a lot too like do you do you think about it every day though do you wake up and feel I've got to fucking have a quick fucking tug on myself you know I mean not that you wouldn't I know but you know I mean rubbing yourself Jesus Christ um no but I think I'm probably more out there than the normal female yeah yeah so but what I'm saying is we do you still wake up and feel horny the minute you wake up you do sometimes well with this the first thing we reach for the is our phone in the morning we quickly check the fucking grinder or the fucking first thing I reach for is my dick to make sure it's still getting hard every morning and it's ears.
SPEAKER_02:Do you yeah really why I know because it's grabbing and I feel proud of it every morning.
SPEAKER_03:Can women have wet dreams?
SPEAKER_05:Can you orgasm in your sleep um that's never I ooh I haven't orgasmed in my sleep but I've definitely had like dreams where I felt like you woke up sticky throbbing like there's a throbbing but okay oh yuck I'm hating myself for asking this question.
SPEAKER_02:Don't do women like and I go I know there's a getting moist thing right when you get turned on but does it get sticky as well or is it just like wet? Because that would be annoying more than me. Well it's normal lubrication isn't it because when you're okay no no so when men get excited they get pre-cum right they get pre-cumming to explain this I need you to just get your phone and Google females creaming versus squirting no I'm not I don't he's gonna come up with a prolab and the reason I'm saying that is because everyone or chat GPT just no just google I need you to see the difference.
SPEAKER_05:But you get like like we get pre-cum do you get it's different every female's different so I have you know and and so I know what some women get nothing they get that little bit of redness and that's all they get.
SPEAKER_04:Yep.
SPEAKER_02:Then you've got women that squirt yeah and then you've got women that more cream when they come am I watching the video or am I No What am I looking at the image of God looking at the answer to the question. Oh that just the answer okay well no I did want him to look at the image button okay female ejaculates are squirting what's the difference squirting is the release of gushing of tens of hundred tens to hundreds of milliliters oh milliliters okay fluid if I thought said fucking liters I'd say fucking hell I'm gonna drown um and see I'm bored already. Does it say what it's made of I'm so bored. I'd rather I've watched the video or to make me sick but I'd rather have watched the video um she's squirting and creaming in the car. Oh she squirts and creams that's on TikTok that can't be on TikTok can't be on YouTube.
SPEAKER_05:All we need to know Matt is what the difference is I don't know google you tell them you tell them I'm not I can't you tell him Nicole because it looked rough and I I'll tell you when I just googled those pictures 90% of them look prolapsed I'm telling you 90% of them look prolapsed did you Google it I did and it's gross what did you okay so so let's just say what AI Google AI says squirting is a large explosion of watery fluid originating from the bladder potentially containing urine and sex proteins while female ejaculation or creaming is a small creamy or yellowish secretion from the path urine something glands a different set of glands.
SPEAKER_03:So it's just like our prostate would be producing the seminal fluid yeah women can cream when they come.
SPEAKER_05:So it's natural and to be honest it normally does it come out can you smell it? Just like sex smells like sex you just and it will normally come out after you've come by the time it sort of come because it doesn't it squirting goes you know there. Yeah where creaming will just like when it sort of come it just that's awesome.
SPEAKER_01:I love the sound of that so it just sort of like comes out and it's more like when I went to wet and wild the other time it felt like that at the bottom of the waterfall.
SPEAKER_03:But it is more of just white and some in some porn you'll see it like it's very yeah can it be thick or is it always thin?
SPEAKER_05:It can be thick and okay so it's pretty much like a guide and it's actually use and if there's any trans people if there's any trans people that are are listening and I'm wrong please feel free to tell me I'm wrong because my source is actually a trans person on 90 day fiance. Okay.
SPEAKER_03:So there's a trans uh male female to male on 90 day fiance who now has a penis and they were asking his girlfriend was asking how he comes and he explained well females actually produce equipment it's actually so whilst it doesn't shoot out like your load yeah yeah that when they build the penis that just naturally comes out okay okay and that is sticky yeah that's yeah so that's a sticky stuff so that's like how do we get around like that's like pre-com basically yeah but it's after so when you orgasm okay and some women some women can't orgasm I mean and I don't know why that is or what causes that to happen because obviously every guy will orgasm you know I mean you can tell you know if they don't ejaculate or they don't have that rush then they're obviously faking it I suppose but oh question remind me for a question.
SPEAKER_05:When when you as a female orgasm do you what sort of like sensations do you get is it like a hot flush is it like um an excitement did you do you have convulsions do you have like spasms and do you feel like you know depends on how intense it is what I'm saying but I'm just saying with a guy yeah but with a guy being completely transparent if I'm in a situation where I'm gonna orgasm and I'm trying to be quiet or trying not to make noise it won't be as an intense right okay it's just you're holding off yeah okay for me and that's just a personal thing it might not be for every fit man.
SPEAKER_03:Yeah yeah I get that no but I do get that just be like let it all out but as a guy there's some guys that we know that are screamers like they scream if I can the more I can scream and let it out the better my orgasm yeah yeah but do you go from like a like a like a um a high of like say a hundred down to zero quickly or does it sort of like come down slowly?
SPEAKER_02:For me it comes down it sort of builds and then comes down and then I sort of just need to be less than a little bit I don't do the soft anyway like very rare okay so if if I okay if I'm in say the showers at the gym or in the steam room at the gym and I'm with somebody and they're coming I'll try not to be loud there so it will I'll still come but I won't be allowed. But if it doesn't feel as good does it not correct but if I'm at home right and you don't give a shit and and I'm really enjoying myself right no matter whether I'm topping or bottoming or whatever it is right um if I'm topping if I'm bottoming sorry getting a dick um and I'm writing I can't help but be noisy right because I'm feeling that sensation on my prostate right just like rub rub rub rub and I can feel it coming and it's just like oh like I'm literally choking back the noises and it's fucking loud sometimes.
SPEAKER_03:He came from someone ribbing his ass.
SPEAKER_02:Yeah did you really yeah he that's crazy I know right like that was crazy to me I blew my I was there with him when he did it I was like what the fuck's going on holy fuck that guy knew how to rim I wanted to take him home um but I already had a collection of him can you remember sorry yeah you were gonna how how do males fake an orgasm it's warm yogurt in their back no no you can't no honestly because I've heard of like mouse fake so if you're fucking someone just go through the process and pretend you you make all the noises and you but it's messy. No not all the time okay okay so somebody like me I'm not showing off I'm not showing off here this is not a bra. Oh you're not all right um but I can if we're having a really fun day at church for example or even not at church I can come four times a day right yeah I could do multiple right I'm a multiple women that's actually quite normal I'm a 54 year old man. So I can't do it now not and that's not definitely not a normal thing.
SPEAKER_03:But a lot of men can't no see that it frustrates me sometimes so for a 54 year old man go and go and then I want to go more and then sometimes sometimes for me I won't always come and I can't always come because I put too much pressure on myself.
SPEAKER_05:And that's what females do you know how you said before why don't and it's exactly the same.
SPEAKER_02:They try and by time number three or in time number four especially there's barely a drop left right so I'm still coming I'm still feeling the sensation of feeling all that kind of stuff but there's not much liquid left I get that I get that because the longer I go it could be like I'm faking it but I'm definitely not the longer I go the drier I get is I would say like yeah see the thing is that where is it if I it doesn't mean I'm not enjoying it but it I just naturally I guess run out. I think last week again last week or the week before when I was on my um drought when I went when I was on my enforced drought when I had my Subaru in the shop when I had my SDI park it up yeah when I wasn't allowed to go and play right so I was just edging most days which is basically getting yourself to the point before you come right which is fun it's actually quite fun right um but then when I did come there was fucking kilos of the stuff I went holy shit I think edging is the best way if you want a big orgasm or a big ejectivity a big load yeah yeah and you edge yourself you can edge yourself for hours and hours and hours and it's almost like it's called gooning can I just tell you that this was meant to be gay sex versus heterosexual sex well no I think we've talked about a lot of it we've talked about sex in general it's fantastic yeah which is what we do anyway this is exactly right and we've completely like I'm not even gonna go take a look don't look at the time everyone's enjoying themselves I'm not even talking about that but like I literally had a spit swallow goggle lined up for us. Well but what if I want to goggle and smear smear oh you had a smear smear smear smear I had a spit swallow goggle smear I've got a question and this isn't talking myself up Matt's gonna roll his eyes here let's not look at him Dave don't pay him any attention okay because Matt always says to me girls can't give head all right okay yeah you roll as Matt you fucking I just rolled my eyes again he said no and rolled his eyes at the same time this motherfucker anyway I've been told I'm good at it by multiple people over the time and I don't understand that because I secretly there's something that I keep a big secret that I don't tell many people because I'm always worried that they'll judge me and think that I can't do it.
SPEAKER_05:I'm tongue tied completely tongue tied would you like to see me stick my tongue out of you going because it's I don't know what that means what's that mean? Can you see the back so see how you've got that drawing there? Yeah see Matt's drawing at the bottom yeah yeah yeah yeah mine's drawing to the top of my tongue so I can't get my tongue out of my mouth oh that's probably actually an added technique because you can't get it out to try to touch your nose at Matt Ready's the go's literally touch it's literally the tip of her tongue that's my yeah so oh wow that's bizarre Ashton wants my son was when he was born as well and had problems like with feeding and stuff so we got his snippets my parents didn't realise I was when I was a child so I never had any issues. So I've always just had it it's been fine my speech has been a lot of people have speech problems I don't have as you can tell yeah I don't have a speech problem I need to so I've always gone through like I can sing I can rap I can do I'm a fucking combo but can dance can dance but what I think what I'm saying is I've gone through life fine so it's been left there but I've always been paranoid that people like because I can't get my tongue right out of my mouth like I can't and so maybe it's just maybe my mouth's more cushiony because of it. Maybe do you know what I mean?
SPEAKER_03:It's also probably you know you're so probably good at at the pressure side of things sucking in terms of like making you use Dave's technique.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah yeah you know and I don't say women are bad at it because clearly men would I know this is I don't know if you've got women listeners give me no give me a finger right oh oh no's going to my permission he's about to put her finger in his where's this going to say that's what I do too I do the exact same thing I do the exact same thing because I can't get my tongue out of my mouth so that's what I'm that's what I do to them do that again no no I need a photo of that no not just what are you gonna do with it the podcast colour that's a colour not with your face just hit your face is already on the colour no it's alright I'll make an AI version of that up because Dave's looking at that in disgust that was amazing well that that that's what I do because I can't get yeah well that that that's exactly right yeah but some guys can't do that though they just don't do it they just don't know how to maybe that's why because I suck dick like a guy maybe you you're a gay man gay it makes so much more sense now big tits it makes so much more sense now does it yeah maybe you were a gay man in your previous life oh yeah we didn't do an AI for you I think I was definitely like a whore a whore we're whores I reckon I probably waited a brothel or something or a madam I would have loved to be a madam oh god even to today I'd love to be a madam I'd love to let's why don't we own a why don't we buy a brothel can we can you catch us can it be called Miami's mansion Miami's mansion that's actually pretty good yeah yeah it has to be let's see that why don't we get a retreat oh Miami's retreat what if it's like a male and female brothel yeah it has to be exactly has there been but there hasn't never been one is there any in Sydney that service male and female clients I don't know we can Google guys if anyone knows of any and if anyone's willing to back us tell them if they're if they know of one that has male and female get into it and a couple of billion bucks our way so we can start this yeah we'll be the brains you be the cash we should apply we should apply to the government for grant for funding a grant what are they going to give us a grant for snakes on premise are I want it I'm not filling that application out babe smart this could be like could you could you fill out the application this is where the ADH is can we not we're going hyper focus you know me and Matt are gonna spend the next two weeks we're registering a business hey Matt hey Matt I've got a serious question I recommend yep how's yoga yourself I've got all my gear still and I'm I'm gonna sit back into it on the U I am I am getting I got the pillow out the beautiful pillow you got me yep that's really cool it is I love it and I've got it out and I'm getting back into it.
SPEAKER_02:Yeah I'm going to as well and I'm gonna do it soon because I'm gonna I need to work out exactly where it is close. Don't put your fucking Pinocchio nose on me. I need to find one close to work so I can actually go after work um so that that way I'm not gonna fucking find time how fucking do this look I just won't go to the club I'm fucking don't go to work.
SPEAKER_03:Do you know that can you can you fund me?
SPEAKER_02:Dave Matt got cranky with me this week he got cranky with me too did he oh I wish I knew we could have had a secret bitch I know right okay fuck you both we can actually do a segment called cranky Matt couldn't we can hang on are we gonna almost wrap up the conversation so we can go into that no because can we do this first? I didn't come all this way just to come all this way okay let me let me okay well let me press this button then ready swallow gargle the choice is yours the fully grown hogos are dirty little whores yes we are and on this week's episode of Spit Swallow Gargle we have our special guest Miami obviously um you've got Dave you've got myself the sexy me and we're gonna add a smear into it as well so we've got Spit Swallow Gargle smear alright um that's because Miami's a smearer um all right but I'm not oh maybe I'll think of a fourth name um let me just no no no no no I've got it I'm going with the same error okay my taste is very different to your taste though guys let's face it you're gonna this is why you're gonna smear everybody you're gonna love the fourth name I'm gonna spit it all right you're gonna love the fourth name all right so we've got these four names to choose from and you've got to choose whether you're gonna spit swallow gargle or smear all right bear in mind Matt says gargling is the best idea I think it is right everyone knows that swallow right smearing oh okay we've all you got it in you gargle it and you just like rub it all over yourself like a night cream I'm gonna give you some options here as well all right so we're gonna do that no no I I am the most indecisive person you've ever met in your life apart from you these people that I'm gonna give you you can choose right whether you want them now right as they are now or as they were back in their heyday alright so the names that will make sense you know one of them that will make sense Dave Dave threw some names at me before and what did I have to say to him Dave I'm bored in 1987 but you've already mentioned one you remember you've already mentioned you'll remember the you'll know these ones one of the persons you've mentioned tonight you'll definitely you'll definitely know these guys I have no idea who you're fucking talking about before if I'm honest Dave alright so we're gonna these are the names we're gonna have it's what you mentioned earlier we're gonna have Sylvester Stallone alright yay then we're gonna have John Travolta alright um then Bruce Willis alright um well obviously not Bruce Willis now well this I'm saying we can they can be then or now alright do we have to say then or now yeah of course you have to or then also diehard is not a Christmas movie it is keep going it is Bruce or or Michael J. Fox why would you even put him in no stop stop because we're all spitting okay we are all fucking spitting so can you just cross that out and come up with something a little bit more like challenging who else have we got that's hot okay who else have we got you want Eddie Murphy um you want some dark meat just getting fucking worse and worse and worse who do you want who's the fourth one do you want Idris Elva uh I can't say his last name but you know I can't remember he looks like oh okay well don't say him then oh god okay hang on hang on let's just you guys talk for a second so we've got like Sylvester Stallone right now now Miami was saying before that Tulsa Kings he's super hot in all right so we're thinking more when I'm saying prime I'm thinking Rocky sort of time right because he was pretty fit then right yep and then when we're talking John Travolta I'm talking either the grease kind of days or like now because I think he's sexy as fuck now determining all right um and then Bruce Willis like we're talking now not Moonlighting yeah we're talking no no more colour of purple um not colour of purple colour of the night colour of the night which is the movie where you've seen his cock right play runner not play runner Harrison Ford Harrison Ford yeah because he was hot in the day yeah yeah Harrison Ford he can be the other one Patrick Dempsey yeah oh yeah okay Patrick Dempsey now and then he's but who yeah Patrick Dempsey he hasn't ever changed exactly all right all right now I forget the others so let's go through this again so Sylvester Stallone right right we're doing one at a time come on what what's your preference what's your preference what's my preference but Hen can we just like decipher what the best to worse is because we have different visions of best to worse.
SPEAKER_05:So spinning is like oh you'll do it but no spinning is the worst in my opinion.
SPEAKER_02:Yeah yeah it's just like a disrespect swallowing or gargling swallowing is the top for me swallowing's number one yeah for me are we gonna okay let's go your allowing them to gargle on going number two then right swallowing their children yeah yeah yeah it's listening to them scream the whole way down your throat and smearing is like rubbing it all over your chest and stuff like that becoming beautified by it Dave told me he couldn't sleep last night why your children were screaming all the way down his fucking throat you like that I feel like that yeah um all right so Sylvester Stallone the grandchildren what are we having what are we having game Miami oh Dave um I think I would probably gargle you can gargle Sylvester Sly good old gargle and the sly and um Johnny T. Big Johnny
SPEAKER_03:I mean not doing all the same thing. No, you go first. John Travel. Well, I have uh John Travel now. Uh definitely. Um I'll now uh um swallow. Swallow John?
SPEAKER_02:Okay. Bruce Willis.
SPEAKER_03:Um smear him or are you gonna it's a hard one because back in the day, back in the day, I would say uh back in the day I probably would have swallowed it, but probably not now.
SPEAKER_02:Maybe no, I'm just saying um you've already swallowed John Shaw or something. I think I would smear him. Smear him? Yeah and Patrick Dempsey, you're spitting, clearly. Alright. So it didn't matter who was there. Alright, Miami, what are you doing?
SPEAKER_05:Um I'm spitting Bruce Willis because I'm it's never been my time.
SPEAKER_02:Okay, alright, okay.
SPEAKER_05:Who else have I got?
SPEAKER_02:Sylvester Stallone? You're gonna swallow or smear.
SPEAKER_05:What's the second worst one after spitting?
SPEAKER_03:Whatever you think is worse. Smear.
SPEAKER_05:Probably swallow no smears.
SPEAKER_03:Best for me. Well, there you go. So you keep that for your tool.
SPEAKER_05:Because when I smear, I gargle first, you know what I mean? Like I and then I let it drip out, and then I smear it all over my face. So it's like it's a combination. And for anyone that wants to can't say, I I sort of demonstrated. So smearing's the best for me. Alright. Okay, I'm gonna say s uh swallowing's probably the second.
SPEAKER_03:What Sylvester?
SPEAKER_05:No.
SPEAKER_02:What? Last line. What are you doing with him?
SPEAKER_05:The the other one.
SPEAKER_02:Who's got this? Gargling. John Travolta. John Travolta? What are you gonna do with him? What are you doing with the I'm gonna swallow him? Yeah, swallow John Travis.
SPEAKER_05:Just to get it done.
SPEAKER_02:Okay. Yep.
SPEAKER_05:But we're on par so far. Yeah, but that's not swallowing for you is like the top.
SPEAKER_03:I've never won say this, but yeah, Patrick Dempsey.
SPEAKER_05:I do like a little bit of Patrick Dempsey, so I'll gargle him.
SPEAKER_02:Okay, all right. And you're gonna smear.
SPEAKER_05:I'm gonna smear the fuck out of Sylvester Sallone. Let me tell you, back then, now, never, when he's in his fucking coffin, that man is like 79 years old. Are you watching Tulsa King?
SPEAKER_02:No, but we're going to.
SPEAKER_05:Well, I want to sit on his face.
SPEAKER_02:If you could have a baby both of them, who would it be?
SPEAKER_05:Sylvester Sallone. Okay, Sylvester.
SPEAKER_02:I want a cock I want a cocktail. I want John Depot. I want a cocktail, baby.
SPEAKER_05:I'll fucking ride that Italian stallion all the way home, let me tell you.
SPEAKER_02:But he's not that big.
SPEAKER_05:I don't care. Watch Tulsa King. Think about his age. This is an 80-year-old man. He and I am.
SPEAKER_02:I need a daddy.
SPEAKER_05:I'm gonna fucking destroy you.
SPEAKER_02:Okay, alright.
SPEAKER_05:Come on there, Matthew.
SPEAKER_02:So for me, right? I would spit Patrick Dempsey. Right? Because you can. He's a bit pretty. He is a little bit pretty. He's a bit pretty, right? I would, and I'm talking back in the day. Oh, I'd swallow Brucie. Right? I gargled John Travolta.
SPEAKER_03:And you're gonna smear.
SPEAKER_02:And I'd smear Sly.
SPEAKER_03:Really?
SPEAKER_02:Yeah. Yeah, yeah. You watch all over you. But I I think gargles number one.
SPEAKER_05:Oh, I need to contradict myself from last podcast.
unknown:Okay.
SPEAKER_05:Contradict or correct? Correct. Contradict. Um, I'm not sure.
SPEAKER_02:Okay.
SPEAKER_05:You tell me what I'm doing.
SPEAKER_02:Okay. You give me the info. You're smearing.
SPEAKER_05:I guess last podcast we talked about who would be my female, who would I turn gay for?
SPEAKER_02:Day for, yeah.
SPEAKER_05:And I said Billy Eilish, which is very much true.
SPEAKER_02:Yeah.
SPEAKER_05:But also Bunny XO.
SPEAKER_02:Who's Bunny XO?
SPEAKER_05:Oh, I love her. Who's Bunny?
SPEAKER_03:Never heard of her.
SPEAKER_05:I know who's Bonnie Blue. No, no, fucking no. Bunny Xbo. Bunny XO. Bunny Xbox. It's Jelly Roll's wife.
SPEAKER_02:Oh, okay. Now I fucking love her. I know who she is.
SPEAKER_05:Let me tell you why I love her. Number one, she is hot. She's gorgeous.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah.
SPEAKER_05:She's trashy gorgeous, which I love.
SPEAKER_01:You love trash.
SPEAKER_05:I love trashy gorgeous. Number three, she's real. Okay. Number four, she was an ex-hooker and she isn't afraid to speak about it. Like she's just so real. Number five, she owns a farm and has lots of animals, and you know how I feel about animals.
SPEAKER_02:Yes, I do.
SPEAKER_05:She's got a podcast. You've got to listen to her podcast. I get it. You will love her. You will Matt, you know how we love Sophie?
SPEAKER_02:Yeah.
SPEAKER_05:You'll love Bunny.
SPEAKER_02:Oh. I love her already. And I look like Pamela Anderson.
SPEAKER_05:She's but she's prettier.
SPEAKER_02:Yeah, she's really pretty.
SPEAKER_05:She's gorgeous.
SPEAKER_02:And she's so that one with the denim jeans. She's so real. She's sexy.
SPEAKER_05:Yeah, but she's I know. But you look at her and you think exactly what her podcast is called, like dumb blonde. Like, but she's not. She's just so listen to her podcast. She's cool.
SPEAKER_02:Okay.
SPEAKER_05:You'll like her vibe, Matt. Okay, Bunny.
SPEAKER_02:A follow for a follow. I've wized.
SPEAKER_05:And Bunny, if you're ever in Sydney, which I know Joe Jelly Rolls coming for a concert.
SPEAKER_03:Yeah, he is. Hit me up. Yeah. Miami's in the Miami's.
SPEAKER_05:Hit me up. Miami's in the house. I've never eaten a clam, but I will.
SPEAKER_03:Okay. Alright. Now, was there something else I was going to do? I think we were going to do the um pet peeves, but I think we're going to probably have to wrap it up because we can do that.
SPEAKER_02:We'll have to wrap it up and let's end it on fun stuff rather than being cranky old pricks and bitches for a thing. Well, we do.
SPEAKER_05:And we all know what Matt's pet peeve is this week anyway. We're both annoying him and we told him what his feelings were.
SPEAKER_02:I told me what my feelings were. And and like you don't know, because you don't know me. We do know. We know you very well. You think you know me? We know now. Look, you get rattled around the ball.
SPEAKER_05:He's doing it again.
SPEAKER_02:He is.
SPEAKER_05:He's angry at us.
SPEAKER_02:I'm angry at you telling me I'm angry.
SPEAKER_05:He's getting wild up around.
SPEAKER_02:Exactly. It's easy to wild him up and think. With that.
SPEAKER_03:Say goodbye to your prolapse.
SPEAKER_05:Peace out, everyone. Prolapse vaginas for life.
SPEAKER_02:It's it's been a fun one. Um, it's definitely been a long one. I hope you can listen to all the stream. Yeah, yeah, you will. If not, just do it in segments. Do it in parts. Do it in parts. That's what I do with. That's a fun one. We've had fun. I I'm like literally tiny bits of the way through the teacher's pet, and I have to stop and pause and stop and pause and stop and pause. But yeah.
SPEAKER_05:Diversing. Digressing. What is it? Digressing. Diversing. All right. Steve, you could have just rolled with us, huh?
SPEAKER_02:Alright, I've been Matt. I've been Dave.
SPEAKER_05:And I'm Miami.
SPEAKER_02:Bye. That's a wrap from us. We've been your Fully Grown Homos, and we look forward to opening your mind, your ears, and your curiosities. Don't forget to like, comment, and subscribe, and share our podcast with your curious friends. You can contact us on Fully Grown Homer's Podcast at gmail.com or any of our socials, Fully Grown Homos Podcast.
